


Kinda Be Into.

by Sincerely_Alex



Category: Be More Chill, be more chill - musical, bmc - Fandom
Genre: Angst, I promise, M/M, Multi, No SQUIP, boyf riends — Freeform, cyber bullying?, ends well tho, he didn't happen, ish?, michael/jeremy - Freeform, michaels pining, squipless man, v gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-11
Packaged: 2018-11-28 18:17:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11423481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sincerely_Alex/pseuds/Sincerely_Alex
Summary: Michael's pining after his best friend, who he's almost positive is in love with Christine- But he just can't keep his affection silent. He's caught talking to himself- by nearly hundreds of people online.. including Jeremy. Angst and fluff all in one, woah ! :o





	1. Performance. Ish.

**_"No but, like, is it a movie or something?"_ **

**_"I told you, it's a comic online."_ **

_**"I don't know, a bunch of aliens destroying the world and helping humans rebuilt it sounds like a pretty bad-ass movie."** _

_Michael laughed a bit, running a hand lazily through his hair as he sighed. School was out for the day, and he was wandering back home with his best buddy. They had gotten about 8 minutes into their argument about weird shit online Michael was into when Jeremy froze, a look of worry cross his features for a moment, before he just sighed and rolled his eyes, upset at himself._

_**"I forgot my bag in class when I went to drop off the extra credit I was supposed to hand in yesterday."** _

_Jeremy kicked at the ground a little, about to turn around and head back in the direction of the school, before Michael stopped him, grabbing his wrist gently and tugging him back a little. His friend looked a little confused, but what met with a sweet smile from the other._

**_"I'll get it, you head on home and get level 10 started up for me- I'll be there in like, 20 minutes."_ **

**_"Don't get caught up in any weird conversations with teachers in the hallway like last time."_ **

_Michael laughed a bit as he nudged his friend, waving to him a little as he rushed off. If he hurried and moved quickly without getting distracted, it shouldn't take too much time at all. They weren't too far from the school, anyway- and the usual crowds in the hallways wouldn't be there anymore. He would be allowed in the classroom, too- since that class was the on that usually held the students that either were supposed to stay after school for getting in trouble, or the ones that decided to stay there on their own terms for extra credit or just more study time. Although he and Jeremy were never really the types of people to kiss up to the teachers and work hard to get extra points, they usually did stay after class near finals just to improve their grades as much as they could- so, although Michael didn't actually had that class anymore, he knew where it was._

_Once he got into the building (thank god for the air conditioning), he made a sharp right and rushed up the stairs to Ms. Pening's classroom. Since the few kids that were still there were in the bathrooms, hanging in the lobby and either waiting for their parents or friends to pick them up or on their phones, or in classrooms upstairs for the previously stated reasons, it was easy for Michael to get where he was going rather quickly. Also- no teachers stalking the halls to yell at him for running in the hallway._

_He paused once he got to Ms. Pening's class, confusion filling his head for a split second. Weren't the door supposed to be open when study hour was going on? So if anyone needed to drop off notes or work for the teachers they could just walk right in without having to knock? The door was closed, but Michael quickly noticed a small slip of notebook paper taped onto it._

_' Due to an increase in students willing to take tutoring classes after school, the extra-credit class has been moved to Mr. Wilson's class - 46D '_

_Well, that room was a lot bigger than Ms. Pening's.. The school actually held a few guest speakers in that room when the time came, so it did make a bit of sense that the after-school shit would be moved down there. Whatever, was Jeremy's bag in there?_

_Michael glanced through the small window by the door, spotting his friend's bag almost right away. It was behind what Michael guessed was his seat, just propped up against the wall. He hesitated, before slowly trying the doorknob. It was unlocked, thankfully. He pushed the door open as quietly as he could, slowly stepping inside and wandering over to the side of the room where Jeremy's bag was placed. He grinned a little, noticing Jeremy hadn't removed the 'Boyf' off of the front of his backpack._

_Although he denied people's questions on the topic, Michael truly did have feelings for Jeremy. It was actually worse than the asshole's thought- Michael had it bad. He felt a pleasant ache in his chest every time Jeremy smiled, but it turned unpleasant once he realized the smile had been caused by thoughts of Christine. As much as Michael loved Jeremy, he'd continue to be his wing man for as long as he requested him to. It broke his heart every time Jeremy asked him to help him talk to her, but he cared about him, so he did it. He had to ignore the sting in his heart as he talked him up to Christine, and forced himself not to scream at her when she seemed to reject his feeling. Jeremy would turn into a nervous wreck, and Michael would always be there to help him._

_He bend down, picking up his friend's bag and running his fingertips gently over the 'Boyf', a soft smile coming to his lips. He almost forgot he was supposed to be in a rush to get back to Jeremy, when he slowly got lost in his thoughts. Words began to leave Michael's lips without his knowledge, but all of it was the truth. Thing's he's been keeping inside his head for a long, loooong time._

_**"God, why can't you get it? How dense can one guy be..? I've liked you for years, but you're always fawning over Christine. I could treat you so much better than she could.. I don't even know if you're into guys, but I would be such a good boyfriend.. Fuck, Jeremy.."** _

_Michael hugged the bag to his chest, sighing in an almost lovesick, yet slightly frustrated tone._

**_"I love you with all my being.. why can't you understand that..?"_ **

_Just as Michael ended his out-loud speech to himself and began to make his way back outside to catch up with his friend, Chloe quickly rushed down the hallway. She needed to get away from the slightly ajar door before Michael noticed her- luckily, she got that entire little 'performance' on her phone._

_That was definitely going online- within at least two days, everyone at school would hear about it. Unfortunately, Jeremy would be one of them._


	2. The Smartphone Hour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's video goes viral- to all the wrong people.

_Michael stayed at Jeremy's for a bit after he got home, knocking out a few more levels of their game consuming probably too many pizza rolls. (High school doesn't mean you're too old for pizza rolls, right?) It was maybe 8 or 9 when Michael was finally forced back home by Jeremy's dad, ending the little get-together with a 'bro-hug' and a soft pat on the back from Jeremy. Michael had to bite his lip to keep himself from telling his friend how nice it felt to have his arms around him, that'd be weird, right?_

_He picked up his bag and headed back to his house, sighing as he looked around. The school year was almost half-way done, and the air had that kind of.. slowly turning to winter but not really vibe to it? The temperature was slowly dropping, but not cold enough to wear heavier clothes quite yet. It was more.. you can smell it? Like, how you could smell a certain thing in the air after it rains- Michael always thought slowly-getting-to-autumn had that kind of smell, too. It was calming- but that was all about to hit the fan when Michael's phone made the little Pac-Man starting sound in his pocket._

_Michael tugged out his phone from his pocket, maybe 5 or so minutes from getting home. He paused, a bit confused once he saw the name on the message. Rich..? Since when did they talk? Sure, they've exchanged a few words wince freshman year, but never held an actual conversation worth anything. (Well, that one time, Rich did try to sell him a fidget spinner, but that doesn't count-) When did he even give him his number? The text just read 'OH MY GOD'. That was a bit..vague? Was he ranting or something? Maybe something happened with his friends and he had no one else to complain to, so he turned to the guy he never talks to._

_Shrugging it off as his previous guess, Michael continued walking as he casually unlocked his phone. Why not humor Rich a bit? If he just replied to his complaints with 'yeah's or 'i feel ya, dude's, this would blow over within an hour or two. Maybe he could send a few screenshots to Jeremy just to have a laugh. As he opened the messages, he stopped cold, his breath catching in his throat. You know that feeling you get in your stomach when you get in a shit ton of trouble? Yeah, it was all over Michael's body. He read over the messages nervously, his hand starting to shake around the device._

**_'dude! holy shit!_ **

**_you said that shit about your friend god damn!_ **

**_bro is this a joke tho?_ **

**_like_ **

**_did you know she was filming you?_ **

**_holy shit dude'_ **

_After that string of messages, there was a video attached, labeled "Michael Melle professes love for nerdy best friend". Well, they spelled his name wrong. Maybe that was the bright side of it, he'd have something to correct the asshole on. After the attachment was, was the 'OH MY GOD' Rich had sent him only a few seconds ago. Michael choked back the anxiety as he rushed home, ignoring his mother's confusion as he raced to the bathroom. (If he went to his room, his parents would know something was wrong and would ask him about if for sure, but he went to the bathroom, he probably just needed to shit, and his parents wouldn't confront him about that. Also- reference.) He was probably crying, but he couldn't tell. He plopped himself down on the floor after locking the door, turning his volume down before playing the video Rich sent him. Sure enough, his fears were confirmed._

**_"God, why can't you get it? How dense can one guy be..? I've liked you for years, but you're always fawning over Christine. I could treat you so much better than she could.. I don't even know if you're into guys, but I would be such a good boyfriend.. Fuck, Jeremy..I love you with all my being.. why can't you understand that..?"_ **

_The video was filmed at a weird angle, but the audio was spot on. Whoever was filming must have known Michael was leaving soon, since right after he finished his 'speech', the person filming rushed off, getting a wall, the floor and their shoes in the last frame or two before it ended._

_Michael was straight up panicking at this point. The format the person posted the video on was one of those school-sharing sites, the ones teachers used to post announcements on or tutorials for certain classes. To his relief, this would mean that the video would probably be removed by the morning. People had tried to post dumb shit on their, porn or dumb videos of themselves just as a joke, but they always get removed. Maybe one of the teachers would get around to removing it tonight.._

_His eyes scanned the comment section -dear god there were so many.. Most of the girls were making fun of him for being so hopeless, most of the guys were calling him homophobic slurs, but it wasn't like he wasn't out to the entire school- Michael had no shame in showing his sexuality, but somehow, this hurt more than the slurs he received in the hallways. At least Christine was in the comments, too, telling everyone to cut it out, that this was something Michael needed to deal with himself and he didn't need this kind of reaction. Not that anyone actually cared, though. His phone was already starting to blow up with texts from people he either didn't know or just never talked to. Rich must have given people his number..God damnit._

_Since this site was one of the things teachers used for their classes, there was a little bar in the corner that had a line of icons, along with named when you move your mouse over it. It was a way teachers could tell who was actually using the thing they sent out, and they could yell at the students who weren't on the correct website. With this, of course, there were maybe 20 or so icons there- currently, at least. It 'Previously 60+' in the corner, which meant more than 90 people have seen this video.. Michael felt the dread slowly crawling up his chest, before everyone else who's seen this became unimportant. He recognized the new icon joining the other's in the corner. Oh no. No n **o no no..!**_

_In disbelief, Michael slowly tapped the the icon (since he was on his phone instead of computer), almost losing the 6 slices of pizza he had eaten earlier. He felt his entire body turn to a mix of too hot and dead cold as he read the name that appeared._

**_'Jeremy Heere'_ **

_Fuck._


	3. Everything about this is terrible.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael dies. The end.

_Michael had no idea what was going to come out of this- but he knew none of it could possibly be good. Jeremy had seen this. Jeremy had watched this. Michael basically just confessed to his best friend without his consent. Well- he did it on purpose. He said all of it on purpose, but he didn't want Jeremy to know about it. Who had even recorded it? He switched to a different page, the one that had the description and info on the video. (The length, the poster, the date the video was posted and a few tags to go along with it.) Michael read over the description, the embarrassment in the pit of his stomach only growing as he processed the words the best he could through his tears. (He takes off his glasses when he cries, which probably doesn't help anything.)_

_**'Nerd confesses his gay love for his best friend while talking to himself after class.'** _

_That was the least offensive part of the page, luckily, it had no homophobic slurs. Michael wasn't sure how much more of this he could read. He quickly scrolled down the comments, slowly relieved he didn't see anything from Jeremy. After a while, Jeremy's little icon in the corner of the screen, meaning he had either signed out of his school account or closed the page- either way, he's not looking at the page anymore. Thank god. He re-read some of the names on the list. A lot of them were people from the school- Rich, Jenna, Christine (who was still desperately trying to get people to stop being dicks in the comments.) but there were a few names he didn't recognize. Some of them, Michael swore, didn't even go to their school- Kay, Ollie, Jared, Sebastian.. He didn't recognize any of their last names- Chloe must have put the link somewhere else online, no doubt Twitter or Instagram- something that had a load of people. The site's viewed count just kept on growing. The names got more and more unfamiliar. Majesti, Emma, Dakota, Alana.. What school did these people even go to? The site was for the entire district, not just the school. Were these kids even in high school?_

_Michael whined a little, tilting his head back as he allowed the tears just to pour. He gripped at the sleeves of his hoodie, feeling his hands begin to shake as the panic attack set in. Jeremy saw that. Jeremy knows he likes him. Dear god, why wouldn't the way he found out been something other than some random girl at school filming him and putting it online for the entire fucking school to watch?! If the world had just given Michael a bit more time and maybe a sliver of confidence, he could tell him on his own. Was this the world's way of telling him to hurry his ass up?_

_It took Michael a while to calm himself down, and when he did, he just didn't want to move. He felt like everything was falling apart. He didn't much care about the reactions of the other students, but Jeremy.. He had seen him maybe an hour ago, but Michael was terrified that would be the last time he'll get to hang out with him the same way. If he didn't end up hating him for the rest of his life, it would still be pretty awkward. He doubted things with Jeremy would be the same after all of this.._

_He checked his phone repeatedly within the next hour or so. Michael decided to make himself a drink (strawberry vanilla ice cream in the blender = awesome comfort milkshake.) and calm himself down, try not to think about what school would be like the next day. It was maybe 11 or so, but he doubted he would be getting much sleep. His hands were still shaking a little as he carried the drink and a bag of fire Cheetos to his room, glad his parents were too distracted with the new season of Big Brother to question him. Every three seconds or so, Michael would glance at his phone. A few times every 5 minutes, he'd unlock his phone and check the messages, thinking maybe it was just being defective and not showing all of his messages on the lock screen. He was still receiving hateful messages from people at school that somehow have his number, but nothing was from Jeremy. It worried Michael, to say the least. Was he on his way over to console him? Was that why he wasn't sending him anything? Was he mad at him? Did he feel just as awkward as Michael did and was nervous about approaching the situation?_

_Either way, Michael was freaking the fuck out. He had good reason to, though. After waiting maybe a half an hour and two more comfort milkshakes (he was running out of ice cream, deciding on mixing frozen yogurt and milk) for a reply, he decided on just messaging Jeremy himself._

**_'hey dude_ **

**_look_ **

**_i know all of that is pretty weird_ **

**_but are we still cool?_ **

**_we can forget all of that even happened and just go back to normal_ **

**_jer?'_ **

_Although he didn't wait too long before sending each message, Michael was still a bit paranoid. Normally, Jeremy would reply to him right away. He almost always had his phone with him and it was a little concerning. Maybe Jeremy went to sleep? Maybe, after watching Michael's embarrassing video, he just went to bed to clear his head? It wouldn't be unlike him..Jeremy wither tried to deal with all his problems at once, or put them off until the morning._

_Even if that was what Jeremy was doing, didn't he normally have his phone next to him on the drawer by his bed? He used his phone as an alarm in the morning for school, and the volume was usually all the way up. He would have heard Michael's messages.. Maybe he turned his phone off? Was he getting bullied too? Fuck. Michael only felt worse, knowing he's probably causing his best friend a lot of embarrassment as well. Wouldn't Jeremy come straight to Michael in a situation like this? Wouldn't he at least check to see if he was doing okay?_

**_'jer_ **

**_come on_ **

**_seriously_ **

**_don't scare me like this_ **

**_answer me man'_ **

_No responses. It didn't even say that Jeremy had seen the messages. Michael swallowed nervously, setting his half-empty milkshake to the side as he sat up, taking in a few shallow breaths. He waited a minute or so, before continuing to text him. He didn't care if he sounded desperate at this point- he was. He didn't really care if he was embarrassing himself more like this. He needed to make sure Jeremy wasn't mad at him._

**_'jeremy_ **

**_please answer me dude_ **

**_youre not mad right?_ **

**_tell me youre not mad_ **

**_please_ **

**_jeremy come on this isnt funny_ **

**_look_ **

**_ignore everything i said in that video_ **

**_were just friends_ **

**_i dont need more than that_ **

**_just come on man please'_ **

_He was starting to actually panic. No answer. The tears came back, his hands starting to shake just a bit._

**_'jer please_ **

**_answr me_ **

**_this isntt funy anymor_ **

**_plese_ **

**_jermy_ **

**_im sory'_ **

_No answer. Michael waited almost 10 minutes (the most painful 10 minutes of his life), but nothing happened. It was almost midnight- not that he hasn't stayed up this late before. Normally, when he did, it was because he was staying at Jeremy's for the night, and the reminder only made his chest ache more. It hurt. It hurt more than he could even try to explain. Why were things like this? Why would someone think it was okay to put this kind of thing online? Sure, she could have just started a rumor that Michael had a thing for his best friend- it's not like the school doesn't already think they're married. But video proof of Michael's affection was not something he was totally okay with._

_He turned off his phone, breathing out slowly as he laid back. Maybe if he just tried to clear his head, he might be able to get some sleep. Regardless of how terrible the day would be tomorrow, he'd get to see Jeremy and talk this out. Hopefully._

_After crying for maybe another 20 minutes or so, Michael slowly drifted off to sleep. Tomorrow was going to be shit, but he needed to talk to Jeremy. The sooner it came, the better._


	4. Did you hear?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's first day back at school after the incident went viral. It goes worse than he thought it would.

_Everyone's eyes seemed to be on Michael when he arrived at school the next day. He knew almost the entire school must have seen that video, but he didn't care. Not now, at least. He checked the site first thing in the morning before he left for school- one of the teachers or aids or whatever took it down, and there was an apology email in his inbox from one of the staff members at school. It explained who had posted the video- god, he should have known it was Chloe right away- and promised that she would receive a fitting punishment. This was more than he thought the school would do, but he didn't care. Michael just sent a thank-you email back to the aid and turned off his phone again. Michael barely got any sleep that night. He didn't fall asleep until midnight and woke up at 4, so that probably wasn't the best idea. Maybe he could have slept in just a little bit? Doesn't matter. The first thing he did was check the website- and after he saw the video had been taken down, he checked his phone. A bunch of missed calls and texts from the same people that were being dicks to him the night before, but no messages from Jeremy. Not one. What hurt even more was the fact that all his messages said Jeremy had read them, just not responded. He's seen things like that in movies before- people getting heartbroken over their texts being read but unanswered- he didnt actually think it was going to hurt him so much.._

_He did get a voicemail- though. It wasn't a number that he knew, but he recognized it. He'd seen it before, of course. Written on a piece of paper and slipped into his best friend's notebook._

**_'Hey, Michael.. I know you probably turned your phone off, and it's understandable.'_ **

_Christine Canigula.._

**_'But I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I know people are being mean, but that happens all the time. Just ignore them and keep your head up!'_ **

_How is she always such a sweet girl? No wonder Jeremy has his heart set on her. She's so kind and perfect, he'd be so good with her. The idea of his best friend being happy with such a nice person made Michael smile a bit, but his heart ached at the realization that that just wasn't him._

**_'I'm always here if you need to talk. If it's alright with you, I can try talking to Jeremy. He's your best friend, I know he's not going to be upset with you. A friendship as strong as yours can't just go away that quickly. Who knows? Maybe he even returns your feelings..!"_ **

_Oh, Christine. If only you knew how the world works. This isn't some fairy-tale, there's no way Jeremy would feel the same way, especially after all of this._

**_'Don't let this effect you too much, okay? Stay strong, just like you always do..!'_ **

_With that, the voicemail ended. God, she was so sweet. Maybe he'd stop and talk to her at school, thank her for her kindness and maybe actually try to use her help if shit hits the fan. He didn't want to think of her as a resource, but right now all he cared about was making sure things were okay between Jeremy and him._

_Michael rushed through the halls without paying too much attention to where he was going or any of the people that were laughing or pointing at him. It wasn't news to the school that he was gay- he's always worn his little pride patch on his left sleeve, Still, he was getting homophobic slurs shouted at him as he rushed down the halls. Maybe these were just people that never knew he existed until the video came out. Great. More attention. Just what he needed._

_He raced over to Jeremy's locker, but he wasn't there. Maybe he had already gotten his stuff? Maybe he was running late? He was probably being questioned by a few people in the hallway and was slightly behind on his usual school schedule. Michael waited by his locker for a bit, trying his best to ignore the shoves and points he got from people in the hallway. He kept his eyes down, before tugging out his phone, sending Jeremy a few more texts. Fuck double-texting. he was going to centuple text him. (Thats like double or triple, but with 100. The more you know.)_

**_'jeremy_ **

**_come on_ **

**_dude_ **

**_where are you_ **

**_are you even up yet_ **

**_you never sleep in like this_ **

**_dude_ **

**_where are you bro'_ **

_Michael was definitely panicking now. He rushed to Jeremy's first hour, but didn't find him there. There were a few people already in the class, but Jeremy's chair remained on his desk. He wasn't at school yet. He made his way back through the hallways, trying to see if Jeremy was just on his way to his locker or in between getting ready and getting to class. He was paranoid at this point. Was Jeremy just hiding in the bathroom so he didn't have to see Michael? It would make sense for him to be avoiding him..But still._

_It took him a while to finally calm himself down and just accept that Jeremy didn't want to come to school that day. He probably pretended he was sick or something to get his dad to allow him to stay home. As soon as 3rd period came rolling around- the one class Michael and Jeremy shared- he wasn't there. Michael expected it, but it wasn't like he was strong enough not to excuse himself to the bathroom for a quick cry._

_The rest of the day at school was a blur. Michael could barely focus on any of the teasing words from other students that he received in the hallways or at lunch- he didn't even eat lunch. He just kind of sat at one of the empty tables. Luckily, he wasn't alone. Christine sat with him, trying to comfort him the best she could. She really was a nice girl. No wonder Jeremy had such strong feelings for her. She at least made him smile a little, cracking a few terrible puns and rubbing his shoulder. That did calm him down a bit. She told Michael that it might be a good idea to stop by Jeremy's house after school, to make sure he was doing okay, at least._

_Once school was out for the day, Michael went straight to Jeremy's. There was nothing else on his mind except 'talk to Jeremy- fix your friendship.' All hope that Jeremy somehow returned his feelings was lost, and Michael only cared about putting things back together and somehow going back to the way things were before his embarrassment went public for the entire school to see._

_Michael got to Jeremy's house a lot quicker than any of the other times he went to his place after school, and he didn't realize he had been running until he was out of breath, leaning against the front door. He knocked a few times, seeing Jeremy's father's face peek through the curtains on the window by the porch. Probably trying to see who it was. He barely made out two words from his dad, but he didn't care. He needed to talk to Jeremy._

**_'It's Michael!'_ **

_His father called to Jeremy, who was probably in his room, hiding away from the world's problems. Michael began to get a bit impatient, fidgeting as he kicked gently at the wooden porch under his feet. He heard a few things unlocking on the other side of the door, before his dad pulled open the door. He looked lazy as always, but that was alright. Michael didn't care. He pushed his glasses up, speaking in a desperate tone. Did Jeremy's dad even know what happened? Maybe the school notified him like they did Michael..No, probably not. They didn't get a hold of Michael's parents, so maybe Jeremy just told him?_

_**"I need to talk to Jeremy."** _

_His dad sighed, looking down and fiddling with the door handle. He hadn't exactly opened the door enough for anyone to get through, just enough to put his head out and talk to the person outside. Apparently, no one was going in or out of the house._

_**"He's not home. Sorry about that."** _

_Before Michael could argue that he was positive Jeremy told his father to say that, the door was closed. He was about to knock again, to force himself inside in a desperate attempt to save his friendship with Jeremy- when he stopped. He felt the tears building in his eyes before he even knew he was going to cry. Michael slowly stepped off the porch and started walking home- then running. He was crying, roughly wiping his eyes with his sleeves as he burst into his house. His parents wouldn't be home for another few hours, so he could allow himself to just bawl his eyes out._

_He didn't send Jeremy any more messages, just flopping himself on the couch and eating the rest of the ice cream straight from the container. He felt like a heart-broken woman in her mid thirties from those dumb rom-coms. But hey, they don't lie- ice cream helps a lot._

_He hid himself away in his room once his parents got home, excusing it as a lot of homework as he thought of ways he would convince his parents to allow him to stay home from school the next day._


	5. I've been afraid to say.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael stays home. Shit hits the fan- but good.   
> Sorry this one's kinda short, but I promise, the next one will be longer! I might even update it today!

_Michael wasn't sure if Jeremy was going to be at school today. Maybe he was just going to stay home yesterday and wait for the pressure to die down? Maybe Jeremy was going to stay home the next few days- or the entire rest of the week. Hell, maybe Michael was going to stay home for the rest of the week. That might be a good idea. High school students are obsessed with a rumor for a week, then move on to something else. A week should be long enough for the excitement to die down. He'd just have to fake a terrible illness long enough to stay home, but not too long that his mom would fret over him and take him to the doctor. Damn._

_He managed to fake a throbbing headache, his mother allowing him to stay home after giving him an all-too-tight hug, and promising she would call every few hours to check up on him. Michael would have to make himself sound like he was in agonizing pain, and with the state he was in, that wasn't going to be too hard to do. He felt like he was dying, yes- just not the way he described it._

_After his mother left for work, Michael flopped himself down on the couch. He made himself an unhealthy mix of what could be considered breakfast if you were high as fuck, which he might be, sooner or later. He put the TV on some random channel- maybe it was news, maybe it was some dramatic reality day-time thing, not that Michael would actually be paying attention to the screen. He found himself just staring off into space, keeping his eyes locked on the wall or the ceiling. He felt like he was high._

_Tears were running down his cheeks before Michael even realized he was crying. When did he start crying? Why was he crying? Hell, he knew why he was crying. He had lost his best friend to his own fucked up feelings. Why couldn't he just be a normal friend? Why did he have to be in love with Jeremy? Why couldn't he just be happy with the relationship they had and keep his damn mouth shut? None of this would have happened if he had just kept quiet. Sure, Chloe did film him..but that was only because there was something to film._

_Michael always seemed to be putting the blame on himself, regardless of what actually caused the problem. He could blame himself for a cat dying in Italy if he really tried. Even if he had nothing to do with the situation, if it had any sort of impact on him, he thought it was his fault._

_He quickly sat up, covering his eyes as his breathing sped up. He curled into himself, just starting to sob. His world was falling apart. He couldn't go back to school. He couldn't leave his house. He ruined everything._

_Michael wasn't sure how long he had been crying, but eventually the tears stopped and he was just left laying there again, his eyes on the ceiling. He wasn't looking at anything, but he was just..done with everything. It took him a few seconds to notice his phone was going off. He thought it was his mom, but it was the text sound, not the call. His mom never really texted him unless it was something simple- didn't she say she was going to call him? ** He weakly reached for his phone, grabbing it off of the coffee table in front of him and slowly sitting up again. When did he lay back down? He rubbed his eyes, slowly unlocking his phone without really looking at the name. He opened his messages, perking up a little as he saw the name. Christine, huh?_

**_'Michael! Have you seen it yet?'_ **

_She couldn't have met the video of him. Of course he's seen it. It must be urgent, though- normally, she's start the message with making sure he was okay._

_**'seen what?'** _

_It took him a few minutes to respond, hoping she wasn't pressed on time. He glanced at the time. She would still be in class.. Christine never used her phone during class. He hoped to god she excused herself to use the bathroom. Michael didn't want her getting in trouble for him. God, Christine was so sweet._

_**'The video! Jeremy's video!'** _

_Michael sat up, starting to direct his attention to the messages instead of halfheartedly responding. Jeremy made a video? Was it something bad? Well, no. Couldn't be. If it was something bad, Christine wouldn't have been to excited to tell him. She'd probably either let him find it on his own, then help him- or tell him just not to watch it._

**_'jeremy made a video?'_ **

_She didn't respond- not with words, at least. She send him a video link. The thumbnail was Jeremy, smiling nervously. God, that smile made his heart ache for so many different reasons. Michael slowly sat up straighter, his eyes wide as he pressed play._

**_'Michael..I'm not sure if you're watching this..'_ **


	6. Performance p. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hint hint- check back to Michael's version in chapter one before reading!

_Michael paused the video after the first line. He sat himself up and took in a few deep breaths, letting them flow out of his chest slowly. Whatever the video had in store for him, it was either going to be the best thing he'll ever see, or completely wreck him. Nervous was a bit of an understatement._

_He rubbed his eyes, slipping his glasses on and wiping the tears from his hands on the couch underneath him. With a shaky, anxious finger, he pressed play._

_**'I know the entire school is most likely seeing this..but I don't care. That might be a good thing.'** _

_Jeremy was holding the phone, looking around and behind himself. He seemed anxious, that kind of worried Michael. From what he could see behind Jeremy, he was..in Ms. Penings class? He set the phone down, apparently propping it up on a few books as Jeremy sat at an empty desk. Now that he thought about it, the entire room was empty. When was this?_

_**'Michael.. I'm sorry I wasnt at school today.'** _

_This must have been posted the night before. Michael wasn't too active then, so it must have gone viral somehow without his knowledge. Oh, thats right..! He blocked all the numbers from the people messaging him at school, so he must have gotten tons of texts about it! He didn't block Christine, so that must be why he's only seeing it now. Why wouldn't Jeremy just send it to him directly? Maybe he was too afraid..understandable._

_**'I was too nervous, I threw up like 6 times while I was at home.. My dad let me stay home- he thought I was sick.'** _

_Jeremy rubbed the back of his neck, laughing lightly. Michael smiled softly. Even when Jeremy was nervous, he still managed to find humor in things. His laugh still sounded just as.. well, Jeremy. It was nice. Comforting somehow._

**_'I had to literally sneak my way into school a little less than an hour after it got out- that's why I didn't want to talk to you. I knew you were at the door, but I wanted this to be the first thing you saw from me. I had to leave, too. I needed to get back here to- well, do this. I'm sorry if it sounded insensitive.'_ **

_Michael breathed out slowly, feeling tears in his eyes already. There was no way this was going to break his heart. He misjudged Jeremy, and was beginning to hate himself for it. He should have known- Jeremy wasn't the kind of person to just block him out of his life at something as small as this._

**_'I need to make this quick, since I only got in here by saying that I left my homework in here. I'm not sure if the teacher's coming back up here any time soon. She's downstairs for tutoring right now..'_ **

_Jeremy paused for a few seconds, breathing out and fiddling with his sleeves. He looked around again, peering out through the windows by the door to make sure no one was heading down the hallway towards the class. Based on the relieved sigh Michael heard, he assumed the halls were clear._

**_'..Michael..I've liked you for years, but you always thought I had a thing for Christine."_ **

_Oh my god. Michael covered his mouth as he felt the tears starting to roll down his cheeks. This was not happening. There was no way something could go so insanely perfect so him after everything he's been through already._

**_" You could treat me so much better than she could..I know that. I always have. She's been..my wing man, basically. I thought you knew things were platonic between us."_ **

_Fuck, he's so stupid. None of the things Jeremy has said about Christine made his attractions towards her seem romantic.. Michael just assumed thats how he worked._

**_" I didn't even know if I was into guys before we started high school, but I've started to fall for you harder than I thought possible.. Fuck, Michael..."_ **

_Michael was definitely crying at this point. He couldn't stop, and he didn't want to. He needed to talk to Jeremy. He needed to._

**_'Michael, I'm..kinda into you. Really into you, actually. What I'm trying to ask you is..Michael..'_ **

_Oh my god oh my god fuck fuck fuck fuck oh my gOD-_

**_'..Will you be the riend to my boyf?'_ **

_Fucking-_

**_'Sorry, that was really bad..Ha, I don't know why that took my so long to come up with. Anyway.. answer me tomorrow. At school. In front of everyone. I know it might be difficult to ignore me for another night, but..we've embarrassed ourselves in front of the school enough.. so why not give them more of a show?'_ **

_Michael was smiling now, through his tears, anyway. He hasn't been this happy in years. Jeremy was right, though. It was going to take everything in his power not to spam him with messages during the night. Spend the rest of the day playing games- now that you're not mad at Jeremy, at least. Take some NyQuil and get the most sleep you can. The views on this video were blowing up almost as much as Michael's video- he supposed no one really cared for gossip when it was willingly being given to you._

**_'Anyway..see you tomorrow.'_ **

_Jeremy smiled and ended the video, Michael promptly lost his shit._


	7. Two player game.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wooo here is the end, my young children. Thank you for all the support I've gotten while writing this, it means a lot!

_Sleeping didn't come easy for Michael that night either. Not because he was upset or even nervous, he was just too eager for the day coming. He flopped around and turned over under his blankets, the voicing in his head shouting possibilities at him. He was excited. How was this going to go? He prayed homophobic asswipes at school wouldn't fuck this up. After an hour or so of rolling around on his bed and actually fucking squealing when he thought about what was to come, he finally got some sleep._

_Michael probably got up to hours before leaving. He made sure he dressed in the best way he could- which was literally his normal jeans and red hoodie, just with Michael staring at himself in the mirror for 20 minutes. He almost did makeup, but he wasn't sure Jeremy's opinion on makeup. Michael never really liked the way he looked, but apparently, Jeremy did. He smiled at the though, deciding to just fuck with his hair. He made it extra poofy today, which actually looked pretty good. Maybe he'd do this from now on._

_He could practically feel his hands shaking in his pockets once he entered the school. Where was Jeremy going to be, anyway? Was this going to happen at lunch? He supposed that would make sense. Everyone would see.. But then again, there would be aids and such, too. Maybe they'd stop the whole interaction. He prayed that wouldn't be the case. Maybe during the one class they had together? No, that's stupid. They'd get shut down for sure. Plus, Jeremy said he wanted the entire school to see. That class was like, what? 20-30 people?  That probably wasnt the kind of thing Jeremy was meaning to do._

_Michael wandered the halls (missing his locker a few times, actually.) He was relentlessly trying to figure out how Jeremy planned to do this entire thing. He ignored the slurs that were still leaving people mouth's at the sight of him. He didn't exactly care anymore, and he barely noticed- since most of the assholes were too afraid to actually say it, so they whispered it. Michael actually kind of thought it was funny._

_After maybe 15 minutes of just wandering around the halls and almost running into just about every student in the entire school, he spotted him. Jeremy was just standing in the hallway, maybe 10 feet away from Michael. He was smiling- warmly but nervously. Michael loved that smile, sweet but hesitant- it really showed how much he cared about him. Without thinking or even caring about what other people thought when they saw, he rushed over to Jeremy, nearly pushing him over as he kissed him deeply. It felt so good, finally being able to kiss him. He's wanted this for a long time, and Jeremy was actually kissing back. It was incredible, and he never wanted the moment to end. Jeremy's arms found themselves around his waist as he pulled him closer 'til the point where they were nearly making out in the hallway. (They were.)_

_To their surprise, people weren't shouting and being dicks.. they actually started..clapping? It's not like they were the only gay kids in school, but barely any of them would do this in the middle of the damn hallway. Not maybe couples, did, actually. It felt good._

_Michael broke the kiss once the need to breathe became too overpowering, tears in his eyes as he smiled. Jeremy was smiling too, and Michael felt his chest clench in the best way possible. There were so many things he wanted to say, so many things he thought he should say, but only one thing left his lips. Thats all he needed to say._

**_"Yes."_ **


End file.
